For some, having children be a part of the wedding is a must. Others would prefer to give it no thought at all. Whether you choose to include the little ones in the wedding party is entirely up to you.

Guidelines

What are the age guidelines for flower girls, ring bearers, and junior bridesmaids? Junior bridesmaids are usually between ten and fourteen, while flower girls are younger, between four and nine. Little boys, usually under ten, can be ring bearers. Other little boys and girls, called trainbearers, can walk behind the bride, carrying her train.

Can I have attendants of different sexes? This is quite common in modern weddings. If your best friend is a male, and he's taking the place of your maid of honor, he's called the honor attendant; if not, he's simply another attendant. Also, if your fiancé has a female attendant she's still called an usher or a groomsperson, but she shouldn't escort female guests to their seats.

Responsibilities

Do I need to have a flower girl and a ring bearer? If so, what are their responsibilities? Etiquette does not dictate that you must have either at your wedding. These roles are there for the purpose of incorporating children in your ceremony. In general, young family members are chosen as flower girl or ring bearer. The flower child walks down the aisle ahead of the bride and scatters flower petals at her feet. The ring bearer carries a velvet cushion or silver tray on which the (stand-in) wedding bands are held until needed.

My older sister is my matron of honor, but I also want to include my twelve-year-old sister as an honor attendant. How would I go about doing this? Recognizing your younger sister is a great idea. Girls of junior bridesmaid age who are given an honor position are called maidens of honor. While you can't count on your younger sister to plan the wedding shower and the bachelorette party, including her along with your older sister should make her feel included and an active participant in the wedding.