Oh, the ring! You have dreamed about it, looked for it, and waited for it. It is amazing how such a “little” thing can have such a huge impact on your life. Just like all the other facets of a wedding, with the ring come myriad questions, ideas, and expectations. You must research the options to make an informed decision about this important purchase.

The Engagement Ring

How do I go about making sure that I get the ring I want without appearing as if the ring is the most important part of the engagement? Many men put a great deal of effort into the quest for an engagement ring, so your best bet is to discuss the matter openly with your fiancé, making him aware of your concerns. Explain how important it is that you find a good ring, since it will be your most treasured possession. No doubt, he'll quickly realize that your emphasis on this major purchase is well warranted.

How much should an engagement ring cost? There is the modern myth that the cost of a ring should equal two months' salary. The truth is some couples have an open-ended budget for the ring and others are just happy to have any ring. What is important is what the ring means to you and to your fiancé, not its price tag. An engagement ring should not cost more than you and your future spouse can afford to spend.

Beyond a Diamond

Can I wear a family heirloom as my engagement ring? Wearing a family heirloom is a wonderful way to preserve the memory of a beloved family member or carry on a family tradition. The ring may come from either your fiancé's side of the family or your own.

My fiancé gave me an engagement ring with an emerald stone. Doesn't the engagement ring need to be a diamond? Although diamonds are the most popular choice for engagement rings, they are by no means the only acceptable alternative. Designs with or without precious stones are all acceptable options for an engagement ring.

Ring Dilemmas

I have a beautiful ring from my first marriage. Can I wear that as my engagement ring? In a word, NO! Wearing the rings that were part of a marriage to someone else is insensitive and in very poor taste. If you have children from the previous marriage, put the ring aside for them or have the stone reset into a necklace or another piece of jewelry.

I would prefer to wear my engagement ring as a wedding ring once we are married. Is it absolutely necessary to have two rings? Many rings have unique designs that stand on their own, so wearing your engagement ring as a wedding ring is a very viable option. Prior to the wedding day, have the ring cleaned so it sparkles like new. Then pass it to the best man before the ceremony.

Can I wear my engagement ring during the wedding ceremony? You can. Simply slip your engagement ring on your right hand, and following the ceremony, slip it back onto your left hand, above the wedding ring.

Wedding Rings

Who traditionally pays for the wedding bands? Traditional etiquette says the bride and/or her family should pay for the groom's wedding band, and the groom and/or his family should pay for the bride's wedding band.

Do our wedding bands have to match exactly? Although many couples today wear matching wedding bands, there is absolutely no rule to this effect. It really all plays into your sense of style. As a little something special, many couples choose to engrave the inside of their bands with their initials and the date of their wedding.

Once we're married, should the wedding rings be worn at all times? Simply put, yes, although athletics, chores, and sometimes your job may call for you to take the ring off temporarily.