Single Parents of Multiples
If you are facing multiple pregnancy and parenthood without a partner, you are likely all too aware of the additional challenges that lie ahead. You will be outnumbered, with more babies than adults in the household. You're going to need extra help, during pregnancy and beyond. It's never too early to start making arrangements for assistance. As your pregnancy progresses, a loss of mobility and a lack of energy may keep you from being productive.
The National Organization of Mothers of Twins Clubs has a single parent support coordinator that serves as a source of advice and encouragement. Contact the NOMOTC (nomotc.org) for assistance in determining contact information for local resources, coordinating pen pals, and an informative brochure.
However, the period of time when you will most require help is during your babies' infancy. With only two hands, it will be quite a challenge to manage the care of multiple newborns. You may want to consider live-in help for a few weeks or months. If you can afford it, hire a nanny or night nurse to provide assistance. As the months pass and you become adept at single-handedly caring for your multiples, you will likely find that your need for help decreases.
Finding time for yourself is a vital issue for single parents of twins. Whether you are a single parent by choice, or through circumstances of divorce or death, you bear the primary responsibility for raising your multiples. To be an effective parent, you have to focus some attention on your own well-being. Think of it as preventive maintenance. Give yourself the opportunity to rest and relax, invest in your health, and develop your hobbies and interests.
In parenting, a partner provides emotional as well as physical support. Joining a support group where you can share advice and companionship with other single parents can fill that role for you. A list of resources for single parents is included in Appendix A.