The Victim Dream of the Planet
Since every human on the planet has been domesticated into some system of beliefs and agreements about the world they live in, the dream of the planet also carries a victim dream. Of course, the intensity of this dream varies greatly from culture to culture, and throughout the many different standards of living in the world.
In Chapter 5, you read about how advertising offers solutions to the victim child's fear of not being perfect. You may have noticed that the product or idea being offered rarely actually addresses the deep fears of the victim dream. No one can buy their way out of their dream of a world where they are helpless and powerless. No product, service, or political rhetoric will change the lie in the mind that says “you are not lovable until you get it right.”
Conflict and the Victim Dream
Everyone may be dreaming the same victim dream, and yet there are endless variations on how it manifests in individuals and cultures. Some people wallow in the dream: “Nothing ever goes right for me; why try?” Others use it as a way to protect themselves: “Please don't judge me. Can't you see what a big victim I am already?”
Someone who believes he is powerless may become a bully at work or in a bar to prove his judge wrong. Another person may choose to be invisible, as a way to minimize the threat to his vulnerability. And many people compete for power, even while they believe they do not have it or deserve it.
You read earlier in this book about how conflict arises when individuals are attached to the knowledge that defines them, and are afraid to be wrong and lose their identity. The more power the victim dream has in a conflict situation, the higher the stakes will be and the more intense the conflict. The greater the fear of being victimized by losing, the more intense the conflict — whether in a barroom brawl, spouses arguing, or countries at war.
What's interesting to note here is that by fearing becoming victims, people actually put themselves in the perfect position to become victims. The reality is that a petty argument or fight might not be worth having at all, but if it does happen, there are both helpful and destructive ways to view such an event.
Agreements in the Victim Dream
Many agreements about taking care of the victim child inside of other people have been passed down through domestication. One such agreement is that no one should acknowledge the shared feeling of helplessness — people have a need to be seen as strong and self-reliant. People in the dream also agree not to hurt each other's feelings — even to the point of hurting themselves, instead.
An interesting exercise is to listen to the voices speaking in the mitote. Take five minutes and write them all down like a movie script. Who says what to whom? How many characters are speaking at once? What do they say about you trying to write them down? See if you can identify the judge voice.
These agreements also include the guilty fear of being wrong or bad when they do hurt someone's feelings or victimize them in some way. Individuals agree to be careful about how they express themselves and treat each other. No one wants to be accused of being hurtful or insensitive, or be rejected for an offense.