Survival Strategies Become Gifts

The Toltec master guides his apprentices to recognize how resourceful they were as children. They survived childhoods that were perhaps neglectful, hurtful, humiliating, or even violent. The strategies they adopted and the masks they learned to wear were the clever adaptations of children under stress. No one was standing by when the children left home to remind them they would not need those strategies in their adult world — so they took their strategies with them.

The strategies are held in place by fear — the fear of being discovered as inadequate, not enough, defective, and unworthy of love. The fear gradually diminishes as the spiritual warrior consistently demonstrates the message of unconditional love and acceptance to the victim child. When you have less fear of being seen and more love for your perfection, the strategies will not be held so tightly, and your gifts can emerge.

Many childhood survival strategies have adult gifts hidden in them. For the pleaser to give freely, without expectation of appreciation or reciprocation, is a gift to all. The rebel is a valuable resource when a person needs to deny the social pressures of parents or peers. The clown can be wonderfully entertaining when the fun is offered as a gift of love, and not to avoid being seen.

The world needs mystics and teachers, dreamers and thinkers, perfectionists and procrastinators, lawyers, lovers, and romantics. When the lie of “not enough” is broken, and these gifts are offered from open, loving hearts, they nourish the souls of both givers and receivers.

  1. Home
  2. Toltec Wisdom
  3. Strategies to Deny, Protect, and Numb
  4. Survival Strategies Become Gifts
Visit other About.com sites: