Making a Connection Is Crucial
In order to begin Tantric practice with your partner, you must make a connection. This is crucial to the process of spiritual awakening.
The purpose of Tantric sex is to build the connection between you and your partner, thereby breaking down boundaries and forming a strong, intimate bond. In this way, you overcome fears, insecurities, get in touch with your own body, and become more aware of your partner's body and soul.
Many women (and even a considerable number of men) do not easily reach orgasm. This is often due to emotional and psychological obstacles, as opposed to physical problems. Making that connection with one's partner is essential to heightening orgasmic potential. We get so caught up in the stress of everyday life, that even sex becomes monotonous. By slowing down and taking the time to really notice and appreciate each other, we increase our sexual awareness and open the doors to complete satisfaction and full intimacy.
Building the Connection
There are various ways you can increase this intimate connection before beginning to make love. You take the first step by creating a sacred environment, a sanctuary for you and your lover. By taking the time to gaze at one another before sex, you are forging that sacred bond. Eye gazing is basic to Tantric practices. That alone can lead you to mind-altering bliss. Massages, both sensual and sexual, are also excellent ways to make that initial connection.
The yoga asanas (poses or postures) and the rituals presented in this book are all ways to establish the necessary connection with your partner. After all, you are traveling this holy path together. You are learning and exploring together. You must learn to open up to your partner and become vulnerable. You are each other's guide, each other's guru.
What are some ways to build a connection?
There are many ways that you can establish a connection with your partner on a daily basis. Next time you touch your partner, focus on the sensations. Do it deliberately and for just a moment, and abandon yourself to the sensation. Also try to say “yes” more often to your loved one's requests, both sexually and otherwise. You may be surprised at the results.
Awaken the Passion
When couples have been together for a significant amount of time, they have a tendency to fall into a routine and forget about that deep intimacy and romance they shared at the beginning. Tantric practices reconnect the couple, reawaken that lustful passion and redirect it. It is no longer passion for the sake of satisfaction. It is a deep passion planted in fertile soil — that is, a love and understanding that is cultivated and cared for and now used to achieve spiritual bliss together.
Communication is key to forming a connection. This means that honesty and vulnerability are welcome in the bedroom. You and your partner need the space to say what you feel, want, and need both emotionally and physically. If this is done with compassion and tenderness, your relationship will grow and flourish.
When people enter into a new relationship and are in that “honeymoon” stage, they are often carried away by the excitement of lustful longing and a new adventure. Tantric practices also help to harness this energy. Rather than starting out strong and quickly burning out, Tantra regulates it, sets a pace, and directs it into disciplined ecstasy. This gives the couple the bases, trust, and compassion that they need not only to have great sex, but also to continue having it into the future.