If at first the ex wants nothing at all to do with you, that is fine; but it doesn't hurt to offer a simple hello every now and then. Also, it can be helpful to remind your significant other and his child of the other biological parent's birthday or certain holidays such as Mother's Day. If you are particularly impressed with the ex's parenting skills, sending a card for Mother's Day from you acknowledges this in a kind and not too over-the-top way, and is a nice gesture. If she rolls her eyes at it, fine, but you have made a nice gesture and that is that.

If the ex has made it clear that she does not want a relationship with you and never will, you may want to ask, through your significant other, if you should say hello if you bump into one another or simply avoid her at all costs. At this point, it is up to her to make the move, and you can be respectful of her wishes and leave her be.

If the ex is somewhat hostile, you may want to meet at a neutral location to attempt to mediate the situation enough so the children are not affected by the animosity. If she does not wish to meet, again, respect her wishes; you gave it a try. If she will meet with you, and you find the conversation is heading to a negative place, stop the meeting and ask if you can agree to not interact with one another for the time being and potentially revisit this at a later time. If she continues to be negative and becomes hostile, leave the situation before it escalates. Do not try to reinitiate contact. Again, you made a solid effort and the timing was just not right.

You may find that, in time, emotional wounds heal and everyone will be able to set aside differences for at least small periods of time for the sake of the children. Unfortunately, there are some situations that do not get better with time. It is best to leave those relationships alone and remember to act with grace, dignity, and respect.