Life is full of ups and downs. Everyone has bad days. Romantic partners know how to offer support. Some of life's rotten moments are pretty small. For example, a speeding ticket is frustrating but not the end of the world. Still, just about everyone comes home after encountering one of these nuisances needing to blow off some steam.

The key to responding the right way to a frustrated partner is empathy. Walk a mile in your partner's shoes. Remember, if it's happening to him or her, some day it might happen to you. A combination of sympathy and humor may help diffuse some of the anger and frustration. The real secret is to pay enough attention to discover what works best in your marriage or romantic relationship.

Then, there are the more serious times of tragedy. Losing a loved one or enduring a major illness creates a real emotional hardship. It's always better to be able to lean on someone who cares when disaster strikes. Being there for your partner often starts without words. Holding him or her speaks volumes. Then, as time passes, your partner may want to talk about the loss. It's never easy, but this is a time when romance and love must be shown with all the energy and thought you can muster. Love means lending support during the tough times as much as relishing the good times. A few words about faith may be helpful as well. Later, when the fog lifts, your spouse will emerge with a greater appreciation for you and what you mean to each other. Nothing builds lifelong romantic connection anymore than that.