Henry Martyn Robert is a terrific role model for those with anxiety over public speaking or implementing the rules. Thrust into leading a meeting and not happy about the job he did, he found a way to improve by observing meetings and reading up on the subject of running them. One of the most effective practices of a successful person (in her professional and personal life) is to imitate successful behavior and actions on the part of those she admires. It's why your mother wanted you to hang out with the “good” kids, after all! Study how others handle speaker anxiety.

Take a Cue

Successful speakers deal with anxiety. They don't just “get over it” after the first time. Most people will tell you they still have mild to moderate, sometimes even severe, anxiety before they speak at a meeting. But they know how to deal with it. They take a few moments alone to take some deep breaths, to calm themselves, to focus. Follow their example.

In the same way, many people who are urged to lead or speak at meetings using Robert's Rules have anxiety over following the rules. They are concerned that they will not know what to do, that they'll make a mistake, and that they'll look foolish. Funny thing is, it'll probably happen sometime, even after you've become experienced with the rules. It just happens. Distractions at the meeting, a temporary lapse in attention, or just simple forgetfulness will probably (surely!) happen. But if you stay relaxed and stop trying to be perfect, you'll be fine!

Anybody Have a Question?

In group situations, it is common for people to find it hard to ask a question. Perhaps it's human nature to want to look like we know everything even when we don't. Call it ego, or call it self-protection. But research has shown that wherever people gather, behind every person with a question are at least five more people who want to ask it but are afraid to do so. Be courageous! If there's something you don't understand about Robert's Rules, ask a fellow member, especially someone you consider to be well informed about them. Remember, ignorance isn't bliss. Who wants to find out later that if you'd asked that question, you could have avoided a lot of problems?

Here's hoping you're feeling less anxious about leading a meeting or presenting at one. You'll find that the more you approach the task as something you can do to contribute and to build your skills, the better you'll do. You're likely to enjoy your group or organization more, too, when you lead or present than if you just attend, sit, and don't say much, then later complain about the way things are going. So push yourself a little, give this book a good read-through, and then keep it handy to give yourself confidence. You're already on the road to success if you've read this far!