Dating Responsibly
Dating is a wide-open topic. It involves so many of the same topics as the discussion of responsibility: curfews and boundaries, sex and sexuality.
Teach your son how to interact with his date's parents. Many parents may ask to meet him before saying “yes” to the date. Coach him on shaking hands and maintaining appropriate eye contact.
Discuss the art of small talk. While it is helpful for him to be able to converse with his date's parents, it is also quite useful for those awkward moments during a date.
Sex is not a four-letter word. Your son needs to learn the joys and responsibilities of relationships. He needs to know how you feel about sex and in what type of relationships you believe sex is appropriate.
If you rely on television and movies to give you an accurate picture of modern teens and sex, chances are you'll feel pretty bleak. Yes, teens have sex. No, not all teens have sex. If you prefer that your son stay off the sex bandwagon, then make sure you talk to him about your feelings.
Essential
Luckily, many dates are group dates, which means individuals usually pay for themselves. However, you need to talk to your son about how to handle the bill when there are only two people at a table.
As a parent, you need to watch what you say about sex. It is really easy to scare teenagers into believing sex is awful and horrible. Make sure your son understands the gravity of sex and its potential consequences — both emotional and physical — but let him know that it is an exceptional experience given the right environment and relationship.
Your son is more likely to have faith and trust you if you do not rely solely on scare tactics to describe sex. This also leaves the door open for more discussions on the topic. If he knows you are understanding about sex, he will be more likely to ask you questions and be honest with you. This gives you more power as a parent to be there for him and to help shape his attitudes about sex.
As the parent of a boy you have probably not given a lot of thought to teen pregnancy. This is fairly common among the parents of boys because it does not affect them, right? Wrong.
Teen pregnancy is a two-way street. Your son needs to know that he cannot assume birth control is the woman's job. He must understand that a condom is a good thing; even if he is having sex with someone who is taking oral contraceptives, a condom will help prevent some STDs. Your son is just as responsible as the girl is if a pregnancy occurs. To prevent your son from getting someone pregnant, you first need to talk to him about what causes pregnancy and how to prevent it.
Study after study shows that abstinence-only education is not effective in reducing the rates of teen pregnancy. Your son must know about birth control as well.
