Grandchildren
Relationships with your grandchildren are different from your relationship with their parent (your child). Like parenting, grandparenting takes on different dimensions as the child grows up, and as the number of grandchildren increases.
If your child creates your grandchild biologically and you were never pregnant, you might think you don't have much to offer as your daughter or daughter-in-law goes through pregnancy and birth. The truth is, she can get all the medical information she needs from her health care provider; your support and love as she goes through the process is what she really needs.
If you adopted your child after infancy, you might feel a little bit at a loss when it comes to dealing with newborns. If you want to, you can take a baby-care class at your local hospital or read some books about newborns and babies. You and your child and her spouse are in the unique position of learning to care for a baby together. You'll all make mistakes, but a child who is raised in a loving home will reap the benefits. The process of pregnancy and birth will likely bring you and your child even closer.
If your child chooses to adopt a child, you will be a font of information for her. You can offer advice and information about the process, the emotions, the challenges, and all the joy it brings. If your child is choosing adoption after infertility or loss, you may be able to share your own experiences if you went through the same thing.
How can I be sure I start my grandparenting the right way?
If you've been asked to help out, your responsibilities will be more along the lines of washing dishes, vacuuming, and cooking, rather than actually holding the baby. Babies must attach to their mommies and daddies first, then come grandmas and grandpas. Wait your turn!
Since you will be an old hand at adoption, your child will not have to face some of the hurdles that you might have dealt with, such as extended family members who are not completely on board with adoption.
