How to Help Your Child Take an OCD Self-Test
Before you take your child for a medical evaluation, there are some simple questions you can ask her to get a clearer picture of her obsessions and compulsions. The language you use should not include medical jargon. Try your best to use words that are familiar and age-appropriate. For example, you might ask any of the following questions:
Do you think thoughts or have feelings over and over that bother you?
Do you check the same things more than once or twice?
Do you wash your hands more times than other kids?
Do you collect things that others throw away? (hair, fingernail clippings, old food)
Are there many times each day when you have to make things “just so” in order to feel okay?
Try to have this conversation in a familiar location, and make it more of a conversation than a clinical assessment. This exchange represents the beginning of what may become a long-term communication between you and your child about OCD. Therefore your child must always feel safe, something you can accomplish by letting her know that you are on her side.
If She Doesn't Want to Talk
If your child has developed a tendency to hide her OCD thoughts and behaviors, you may have to do some gentle prodding to get her to talk about them. One way to reassure her is to say something like, “Other kids have this happen to them too,” or “You know there are things we can do to make your bad (or nasty, bothersome) thoughts go away.”
If your child becomes visibly upset by the conversation, reassure her that she isn't in this alone, and if she opens up and talks about the problem, let her know that you can help her try and solve it. Or, if she's still not ready to open up, let her know you are there, ready to help if and when she does want to talk about it. Like adults, a child sometimes needs to pick the time for a difficult conversation.
As mentioned in earlier chapters, you should also be aware that in some young children the compulsive behaviors they perform might not be accompanied by obsessive thoughts (at least not any thoughts they are aware of). This can make the child less aware and less able to discuss her own OCD behavior. In this case, you may need to gently offer examples of behaviors you've noticed that your child is not conscious of.
