Jamming the Triggers
Whatever strategies you set up for your child to counter binge triggers, ensure that they are constructive, action-oriented steps that address the root of the problem. Plotting revenge on someone who teases or drastically cutting calories in an effort to counter the impact of a binge don't promote healthy behaviors. Taking positive steps towards both physical and emotional fitness is the best way to keep your child's enthusiasm up and prevent a further fall.
Comfort from Friends, Not Food
If your child overeats when he's emotionally injured or drained, work with him to funnel the negative energy into positive outcomes. Have a list of five people with whom your child feels comfortable. Encourage him to call them when he's feeling bad and needs to talk — in other words, to reach for the phone before he reaches for the refrigerator. Try to represent a good cross-section of friends and relatives so there's an ear to bend for a variety of situations. For example, he may feel comfortable talking to an aunt about family issues and a friend about a problem with a peer, but not vice-versa.
It's also possible that your child won't want to talk about what triggered a binge, at least not right away. He may be too angry or ashamed, or he may simply not have the words to adequately express his feelings right away. Channeling his anger and frustration into physical work, such as a brisk walk or bike ride, may be a good way to let him blow off steam and clear his mind for analyzing the problem.
If exercise doesn't appeal, then journaling is an excellent alternative. Spilling those complex emotions out on paper provides an opportunity to sort through them and view the situation objectively. Aside from the therapeutic value of simply venting his bad feelings, journaling also gives your child a safe place to construct theoretical scenarios for dealing with problems. Sometimes journaling about an experience offers the writer a sense of control over what seemed out of control when it happened.
A child counselor or therapist is often a good choice for children who are unable or unwilling to talk about problems with parents or other confidants, or who seem to be having difficulty working past a lapse in their fitness program. For more on finding and working with a therapist, see Chapters 12 and 13.
Your child's journal is his emotional safety net; a place where he can talk about anything without fear of repercussion. Unless you have his explicit permission to look at it, never breach his trust by reading it. The only exception to this rule is if your child has given you reason to think that he may hurt himself or others through his words or actions.
Beating Boredom Without Food
If your child tends to eat when she's bored, work with her to compile a list of active options she can choose instead of food when she's dealing with the doldrums. Hang a copy on the refrigerator or pantry door and challenge her to complete as many as possible over the next month. Make the choices fun and varied so she can choose what suits her mood. Your list might include anything from a game of Horse at the driveway basketball hoop to planning a healthy family dinner that includes food in every color of the rainbow.
