Bringing Him to Orgasm with Your Hand

Penises like to be touched. They present themselves in a way that let you know that—all out there in the open to be admired and appreciated. Most men have been touching themselves since they were young boys. Your male lover has most likely figured out how to touch himself in a way that feels good to him and brings him to orgasm. But having you take over will undoubtedly be a real treat, and it might be considerably more exciting for him.


How can I be sure to give him the kind of manual stimulation he likes?

Have your lover wrap his hand around yours, and start you off with both a pressure and a pace that feels good to him. At any time, he can bring his hand back to encourage you to apply different pressure or change the pace or rhythm.

The basic hand job involves using your palm and fingers to stroke up and down the shaft of his penis. Use a light or firm grasp, depending on his preference. And use lubrication to keep your hand from chaffing his skin. Start by keeping a steady pace or rhythm, unless he wants you to vary it. Let your stroke simulate what his penis might feel during penetration. Aim for smooth, gliding strokes. The pressure of your grip and the rhythm of the stroking can and should change over the course of your hand job.

Tips and Techniques

There is a lot of room for your own exploration in giving hand jobs. Try the following tips and techniques. Never forget that your lover is ultimately the expert. If it works for him, it's a good technique. If not, try another.

• Begin with feather-light, tickly movements using just the fingertips up and down the shaft of his penis. You can do this before you have applied any oil.

• Play with just the head of his penis. It is the most sensitive area. Lightly squeeze the coronal ridge with your fingertips. Circle around it and the frenulum with one finger, using feather-light upward strokes.

• If your male lover has some pre-cum secreting from the tip of his penis, you can use that to lubricate and titillate the head of his penis, before adding additional lube.

• Avoid the head of his penis for a while, as a way to tease your lover and help build the anticipation.

• Alternate hand over hand. Use only downward strokes from the head of his penis to the base. Lift each hand as it finishes its stroke, bringing it back to the head again, without stroking back up the shaft. If you rapidly alternate this stroke with both hands you can give him the sensation of an endless tunnel, or penetrative entry.

• Use a corkscrew motion to spiral your stroke down or up his penis.

• Use both hands together for stroking. This allows the penis to feel totally engulfed and can also make your man feel really big, so big that you have to use two hands to wrap all the way around him.

• Some men like to have their testicles lightly cupped or stimulated during a hand job. See what your man thinks about this.

• Use one hand to firmly grasp the base of his penis as the other hand strokes the shaft and the head. This can allow you to stroke very firmly and intensely without him feeling any uncomfortable tugging or pulling.

• Find your rhythm with each new stroke, getting into a groove. This will enable him to surrender more fully. Consistency can help establish an erotic trance and get him closer to orgasm.

Time for Orgasm and Ejaculation

When you are ready to bring your male lover to orgasm, increase the intensity and pace of your strokes. You might increase the pressure too, if that's okay with him. Be consistent with this higher-intensity stroking until he comes.

The head of your lover's penis may become very sensitive upon ejaculation, so ease up a bit as he completes his orgasm. Check with him to see what he prefers. When your lover ejaculates, you may choose to let him come on your hand, some other part of your body, his own body, or on a washcloth or towel. It helps to have a plan for this ahead of time.


Comment on how big and hard and beautiful your lover's penis is. Let him know how much it turns you on to be touching him, or how much you love giving him pleasure. These types of compliments and reassurances will help him surrender more to the experience.

After he orgasms, you can help him surrender to the pleasure he is experiencing. Rest one hand lightly over the shaft of his penis and the other over his heart. Just be present with him as he comes back to resting. This is a good time to share with your lover how much you love him or how beautiful he is, or to just enjoy peacefulness together.

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