What author Dr. Jeffers explains in Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway is that people often feel scared, but that isn't necessarily a reason not to do things. (In fact, as you may already have discovered, giving in to your worries only gives them the upper hand.) Naturally, you shouldn't do anything patently dangerous or foolish. But the other things — those you're prevented from doing only by your fears — are the things that should be done anyway. Allow yourself to feel the anxiety, the author counsels. Then plunge ahead!

Of course, if you are afraid of something truly dangerous, such as contracting a fatal illness, jumping off a bridge, or eating poison, please do not get the idea of ridding yourself of the fear for all time by running toward the flame. That would not be therapeutic. If a reputable cognitive behavioral therapist wouldn't recommend it, we don't, either. You may feel frustrated, but there are many better ways to achieve the same end without putting yourself in harm's way.

It's best to have some competent guidance from a cognitive behavioral therapist when you want to stand up to your fears. Failing that, a self-directed program, such as the one found in the OCD Workbook, may be able to help you get started. Reading about CBT and ERP (exposure and response prevention) may also help you on your way, particularly if you can find a psychologist who is willing to learn those techniques and help you practice them.