If you can, try to build a support network of trusted advisors before you're faced with having to manage your money alone. If you haven't been able to do that, start by interviewing the people your partner worked with. Don't limit yourself to them, and don't rush to make a decision. This new relationship with a past advisor or a new one needs to benefit you. Give yourself time to pick someone you're compatible with.

Where to Look

Review Chapter 18 for ideas on what type of advisors you'll need to help with your financial planning. If you haven't been introduced to your partner's advisors, check his account statements and insurance policies. The sales person who sold the policy will be named on the statement along with her phone number. Investment advisors will either send investment statements on their letterhead or they'll be named as advisors on the brokerage account statement. Look for cover letters enclosed with estate documents for name and contact information of the attorney who created them. Check e-mail accounts, address books, and check registers for other advisors your partner did business with. His pay stubs will have the company name and contact information you can use to get in touch with human resources officers at his employer.

Deciding Whether to Change

Your spouse or partner's advisors will be able to help you cope with the urgent matters that need attention right away. They're familiar with the financial information and will have access to the accounts. If the accounts were not joint or in trust, you'll need to be named as executor before you can access them.

You don't have to continue working with previous advisors. Observe how well they help you during this stressful process as a gauge to how well they'll work on your behalf later on. Don't work with anyone who makes you feel minimized or seems unempathetic, and absolutely don't work with anyone who is pressing you to make quick decisions on things that don't have firm deadlines, particularly investment changes or buying new investment products.

Expertise and Specialties to Look For

If you can't find any past financial advisors, or if you don't think your partner had any, talk to the lawyer who is helping you through probate — or even your funeral director — for referrals to a financial planner and an accountant. Certified Financial Planners and Certified Public Accountants both have the broad expertise to help you get started organizing the estate and getting your own finances in order.

Don't forget yourself in the process of focusing on your financial security. Money spent on therapy to help support the grieving process is money well spent on your future physical and emotional health. Take care of yourself.