There is one option that hasn't been discussed: not doing anything. Not everything needs to be fixed. Many people who study forestry have become convinced that one of the big reasons we see so many large forest fires these days is because for years, people in charge of the vast land tracts tried to suppress every flame. As a result, the burning that happens as part of nature was never able to help clear underbrush and reduce the amount of fuel littering the forest floor. When a fire happens, it's as though someone has stockpiled cordwood for a New England winter. There's plenty of material for the fire to consume, and the blaze soon rages out of control. Sometimes the wisest course of action is to stay out of the way.

Pick Your Battles

There is a difference between true conflict that threatens progress and the everyday tensions that adults must learn to manage. Don't move in quickly at every sign of trouble. Often, you're only seeing one small facet of a more complex situation. Would you take a significant corrective action every time someone who works with you makes a mistake? More importantly, would you want someone to eliminate all mistakes from your life?

Absolutely not. In addition to being invasive, the atmosphere would be insulting, as though you were incapable of taking care of yourself. Furthermore, if you try to wipe out mistakes, you also remove the chance of learning.

Don't treat every hiccough as a call for the emergency response squad. Definitely take action when you are faced with real conflict that threatens to delay or derail your team's progress toward its goals. Yes, taking action earlier rather than later can mean the difference between a small fix and a big one, but make sure that conflict resolution is actually in order. If you try too soon, you tie up resources that might be more effective elsewhere and run the risk of being the boy who cried, “Conflict!” A wolf of a real problem will trip you up when people have grown tired of mobilizing for nothing.

Minimize, Not Remove

Don't assume that you must absolutely remove every conflict. No, you don't want them to come back, but some conflicts won't return. If what you see is timely in nature and not evergreen, then do enough work to get it out of the way, and then leave it behind you. There are times that the best way around an obstacle is literally to walk around it, not to yank it up and toss it to the side. If the blockade is a naturally occurring mountain, you won't move it anyway. Try for the wisdom to know when circumvention is the only tactic worth using.

Things Fall Apart

Notice that failing isn't an option. There's too much of that in the world already, and if it happens, you'll know soon enough. No individual or group smoothly reaches every goal, and at times you will be stopped dead in your tracks. Then you have to decide, honestly, how critical that agenda is to your overall progress and whether you really need it. If not, let it go and focus on important issues. If so, then dust yourself off and start over again.