Interviewing over a Meal
If you are unfamiliar with mealtime etiquette, you may want to brush up on your skills — you may be invited to join your potential employer for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Some employers choose to interview job candidates over a meal. This is a real possibility, particularly if you are interviewing for a job out of town.
While sharing a meal with someone may conjure up feelings of familiarity, don't be fooled into thinking the interview is going to take on a more casual tone than it would have if it were taking place in an office. In reality, you have more to think about than how to answer the questions the interviewer is asking. The interviewer will not only be listening to your answers, she will also be judging your behavior. Learning some simple rules of dining etiquette should put you at ease. Then you can concentrate on more important things — like giving answers that make you shine.
Arriving at the Restaurant and Getting Seated
One of the more awkward moments of a mealtime interview could happen at the very beginning — arriving at the restaurant. Of course you are going to be punctual and arrive at the designated time, but that means you may arrive before the interviewer. If you do arrive first, give the interviewer's name to the host or hostess who may have a reservation for him. It is okay to sit down at the table to wait, but don't order anything yet.
When the interviewer arrives at the table, stand up until he sits down. If both of you arrive at the table at the same time, wait for the interviewer and others in your party, if there are any, to be seated before you sit down.
Gender rules generally do not apply when you're in a business setting, such as a mealtime job interview. It makes no difference whether you are a man and the interviewer is a woman or vice versa. If you are seated when the interviewer gets to the table, you should stand until he or she is seated.
Perusing the Menu
You may love spaghetti and meatballs, but is that the smartest thing to order when on a job interview? It probably is not. You should stay away from anything that is difficult to eat neatly. You don't want to risk looking like a slob or having to think too much about the process of eating instead of answers to the questions the interviewer is asking you. Also avoid foods that might get stuck between your teeth, like anything with poppy seeds or spinach.
Stick a package of dental floss in your purse or jacket pocket. If you suspect that you might have something stuck between your teeth, you can slip into the restroom to remove it. You also might want to carry around some breath mints (not chewing gum).
Avoid consuming any alcoholic beverages even if you can hold your liquor quite well. Alcohol dulls your senses and makes you less inhibited. This is one situation when you want to be at your sharpest. You can order a soft drink or water instead. If wine is being served at the table, to be polite, allow the server to pour you a glass, but sip it very slowly.
Before you pour yourself water or take a roll from the breadbasket, offer the item to your fellow diners. Ask if you can pour water for anyone else or pass the breadbasket around the table. The same goes for the butter or any other condiment on the table. If there's only one serving of something left, such as the last roll in the breadbasket, offer it to your dining companions before you take it.
Don't order the most expensive thing on the menu. Order a moderately priced item. You don't want to take advantage of the employer's generosity, since it is likely she will be footing the bill. Order a dish that can be prepared as described on the menu. You don't want to have to give the waiter a lot of specifications (“Can I get that without onions, mushrooms, or peppers, please.”). If you order that way you will look too fussy.
Eating
Don't begin eating until everyone at the table has been served. Don't cut up all your food at once — cut off one piece at a time and put your knife down on the edge of your plate between bites. Use your napkin to remove crumbs from your face, remembering to dab at the corners of your mouth, not wipe the napkin across your lips. Put your napkin down on the table neatly. Don't crumple it up.
Even if you try to eat neatly you may end up getting something on your clothes. You don't have to worry about walking around like that all day, especially if you are heading back to the employer's office. There are several products on the market that can instantly remove stains from clothing. These products come in packages that are the size and shape of a pen and can easily fit in your pocket or purse.
Unless you've been to several formal dinners, you might be baffled by the number of utensils at your place setting. You may wonder which fork to use first, for example. It's really quite simple. Generally, your salad or appetizer fork is smaller than the other one. Sometimes, though, you end up with two forks that are the same size. A good rule of thumb is to use the fork farthest away from your plate first and work your way in.
Since the whole point of this lunch (or dinner or breakfast) is to conduct a job interview, it is likely that you will have to speak during the meal. It may be obvious to you as you read this that you shouldn't talk with your mouth full. However, you may forget this important rule as you try to answer questions the interviewer asks you without looking like you are hesitating. It is always good manners to chew first, swallow, and then speak. Finish answering the question before you continue eating.
Wondering when the meal is over? Follow the interviewer's lead. If she puts her napkin on the table it means the meal is over. Finish chewing, wipe your face, and place your napkin on the table to signal that you are done, too. Don't stand up and get ready to go until the interviewer does, though. She may still have more questions to ask you.
When the interview is done, shake the interviewer's hand. Then thank her for her time and for the meal. Ask when you can expect to hear any further news and reiterate your interest in the job, just as you would at an interview that takes place in an office.
