Isaac and Rebecca's son Jacob is very different from his parents and so meets and marries his spouse in a very different manner.

Jacob and Rachel

Rachel and Jacob meet in a very different way than Jacob's parents Isaac and Rebecca. Jacob is running away from his brother Esah, who is trying to kill him, and Rebecca tells Jacob to run to his Uncle Laban's home. When he is near his destination he sees some shepherds near a water well about to give water to their flocks of sheep. He asks them if they know his Uncle Laban and they say yes. “And look,” they say, “here comes his daughter Rachel with Laban's flocks of sheep.” Jacob then asks them why they are standing around the well and they reply that they have to remove the heavy rock from the top of the well to give their sheep water.

Jacob looks over at Rachel, who is approaching with her families' sheep, and single-handedly lifts the rock off of the well. He then gives water to the Rachel's sheep, kisses Rachel, and weeps. Jacob tells Rachel who he is and she runs to tell her family.

Though Jacob and Rachel's story involves both a well and and one future spouse is helping and giving water to the other, Jacob's love for Rachel and the way he expresses it is clearly very different from that of his father and mother, Isaac and Rebecca. While Rebecca and Isaac's love for each other needs time to grow, Jacob is deeply moved by his love for Rachel even at first sight. However, he will have to work for fourteen years for his uncle Laban to finally marry Rachel, and he does the work willingly since he loves her so much.

Learning from Our Ancestors

Though the relationship that Jacob and Rachel have is so different from the one Isaac and Rebecca nurture, there is much to learn from both. Whether it is love at first sight or love that grows over time and even after marriage, the important aspects of keeping a relationship going are both partners' ability to give to one another deep loyalty like Jacob's for Rachel — even over the course of many years — and a vision of their future together. Judaism teaches that like the love of our ancestors, every relationship plays an important part in a much bigger picture of our world and the future that will emerge from the relationship. If you and your fiancé have similar values and you fit into a bigger meaningful worldview beyond your love for each other, you will always feel joined as one.