The music that each family or partner listens to and feels is appropriate at a Jewish wedding may differ also. If one family or partner is more traditionally Jewish, they may want more traditional Jewish music and dancing. A less traditional family or one that is not Jewish may be unfamiliar with Jewish wedding music or dancing and may not want any, feeling that it might make them, their relatives, or their guests feel uncomfortable or less included.

It is very important to remember that a wedding is essentially a time for each family to show themselves and their values to everyone they know. Religious and cultural convictions are powerful. Less religious families worry that their friends and guests will be put off or think them extreme, and religious families worry that they will be seen as too lenient or compromising. Within Judaism, if one family subscribes to Jewish law, halacha, and the other does not, it is difficult for one committed to religious law to be asked to compromise, though they should be encouraged to speak with a rabbi for guidance. The couple should try to seek out a rabbi who can understand both sides and cultures and can take into account the religious and cultural sensitivities of each family.