Turn Up the Heat
To take oral sex up another level, you can add in stimulation with your hands or breasts. Encourage your partner to receive more pleasure by stimulating other parts of his body as you're performing oral sex. Or you can ask your lover to touch you as you're doing it.
Caressing, teasing, rubbing, biting, blowing, pulling, cupping, even scratching lightly — all these things and more will add to the overall pleasure during oral sex. Try gently pulling the pubic hair around your lover's genitals. Comb your fingers through the pubic hair and use your hands to pleasure the breasts and nipples; rub your breasts across his legs as you take his penis into your mouth.
Here are a few other fun suggestions:
-
Try humming while engaged in oral sex. Gently vibrate the lips to add the sensation to both the vulva and the penis.
-
See how it feels to give and receive oral sex while standing or kneeling. Men will often get harder when they are standing or kneeling.
-
Relax into an overstuffed chair while engaging in oral sex. This works for either partner and keeps the neck of the giver from cramping.
-
Many couples think the position 69 (with both partners giving each other oral sex at the same time) is the ultimate. It is sometimes difficult for women to receive a gentler touch because the man will often want a faster, firmer stroke. But both partners tend to melt into a similar speed and touch when in 69.
The “69” position.
-
Use ice cubes, warm liquids or liquors, or edible body butters for an added turn on. These may also be a great way to introduce a reluctant partner into trying oral sex.
Never coerce reluctant partners into doing anything that they feel isn't right for them. Do encourage them to talk about their feelings and attitudes about the subject, and do express your own feelings, but don't try to convince them to change.
As you explore oral sex, ask for your partner's feedback. If you're the giver, pay attention to what your partner is saying. If you're the receiver, don't just assume your partner knows your body or your mind. If you need help expressing yourself, use this simple communication technique:
-
Say something you like that is happening right then: “I love the speed you are using.”
-
Ask for a single change: “Would you try moving slightly to the left?”
-
Give some kind of a response: “Ah, thank you, that's great” or “Oh, that's not as good as I thought it would be.”
This simple communication technique includes an acknowledgement, a single change, and a response. This can be used over and over to get the kind of touch that you love. It's training for your partner and for you to know exactly what it is that turns you on!
