Anal Stimulation and Anal Sex

Anal sexual activity is a taboo subject for many people. Yet, just as oral sex was a few decades ago, anal sex and other forms of anal play have come into more favor in recent years.

One partner is often more eager and/or curious to try anal sex than the other. If your partner is willing to try, great. But if not, you may suggest experimenting with other types of anal stimulation.

The truth is that the anus and the area around it are full of nerve endings. There are a variety of things you and your partner can do to stimulate these areas besides anal intercourse. Pleasurable attention to the anus can lead both of you to much stronger orgasms and sexual ecstasy.

Women will like stimulation of the anus toward the area of the G-spot. The membrane between the anus and the vagina is very thin. Combining anal and G-spot stimulation adds to the sensual feeling for women.

Because the G-spot is analogous to the prostate gland, men will like this upper area also. Feel for the prostate gland. Hold pressure here when stimulating the man.

Finger Play

There's no reason to rush. Begin by talking about any beliefs or hesitations you might have with your partner. If you both agree to try some anal play, keep it simple, and communicate with each other while you are experimenting. Don't expect too much at first, and have the receiving partner be in complete control of the situation.

Latex gloves can be essential to have on hand for things like anal play. Keep gloves, finger cots, and condoms around for such occasions. They can add a sense of fantasy, play, and safety to your sexual exploring.

It's best if your first few experiences are limited to finger play. Before you begin, take a bath to get clean and relaxed. Open your partner up by massaging and being playful.

Introduce anal play by lubricating a finger and playing with the area immediately around the anus before moving toward the opening. Slowly and gently add a little stimulation without entering. Ask your partner if he is ready for you to enter. If you get permission, slowly and sensually insert one finger.

It's helpful if you are both turned on before anal play starts. Men, try giving your partner oral sex first and ask her if you can enter her with one finger as she is close to orgasm and after you have stimulated the outer area of her anus. The same applies for men. He should be turned on first — he will be much more accepting of penetration.

Anal Sex

Never put a finger, hand, penis, dildo, vibrator, or anything else into the vagina if it has just been in the rectum or anus. This can cause the woman to get a vaginal infection. Always wash anything that has been in the anus very thoroughly before inserting it into the vagina.

Try experimenting with some anal toys before you have anal intercourse. Women may love having a small, soft anal plug inside them while having vaginal intercourse. Men, you'll love the tighter fit, too.

If you're ready for anal sex, be sure to use lots of water-based lubricant, because the anal cavity doesn't self-lubricate. And unless you are monogamous and both of you are HIV negative, use a condom during anal intercourse.

Anal sex, with woman on her back.

Before you begin, massage and warm your partner's anal area. Make sure she's relaxed and ready. The woman's anus will actually relax and open if you go slowly and let her set the pace. Place the head of your penis at the entrance and allow her to move toward you.

Good positions to start are with the woman on her back with her legs up and the man on his knees.

Anal sex, with man lying on side behind woman.

Rear entry works well, but don't try this the first time you have anal sex, because the woman is less in control in rear-entry positions.

A good anal sex position, especially for couples who are first experimenting with this activity, is for the man and woman to lie on their sides, with the man behind the woman. This generally makes frantic thrusting difficult, which may put the woman more at ease.

Remember, don't ever coerce or force your partner into anything he doesn't want to do. Learning to relax into anal stimulation is healthy. The anus and buttocks area holds a lot of tension and stress. It is to our advantage to learn to relax that region, both physically and emotionally.

  1. Home
  2. Great Sex
  3. Hot Spots and Sexual Taboos
  4. Anal Stimulation and Anal Sex
Visit other About.com sites: