Dealing with Family and Friends
Naturally your family and friends are very important to you. They may see that you already have a child and wonder when, if ever, you will have another. Some may be as bold and as blatant as to ask when you're planning to have another baby. Other may not be as brazen. Either way it can be hurtful to have to explain to them that you are trying to have another baby.
How much you intend to share with each individual is totally up to you. If you decide to give short and quick answers like, “We're working on it,” and leave it at that, this is totally within your right to do. How much or little you choose to share depends on many factors.
You may choose to share certain details with only some of your friends and family, while leaving the rest a bit more ambiguous. You may choose not to confide in anyone within your family but prefer to stick more closely to family and friends. Whichever you choose to do be sure to have some quick answers in store for the family gathering that are likely to bring up questions about future additions.
If you do choose to share your fertility issues with friends and family, remember that they may have trouble understanding the concept of secondary infertility, just as you probably did at first. Don't be offended if they ask questions that you may think are insensitive.
Helping to educate your family and friends through reading and perhaps doctor's appointments can be great. The author of
Some family members may never ask. They may assume that you do not want more children. They may assume that you would prefer to have an only child or that you are waiting for the right timing in your life to add another baby. Of course, you may also have some family members who constantly ask you about your plans to have another baby. This can lead you to dread interaction with your family or this person. This can serve to further isolate you. Be very careful about pulling away from your family support system.
