Living with Fatigue
Unfortunately, for some people, fatigue is a constant companion that refuses to budge even after a good night's rest. There may simply be days when the fatigue is better or worse, often for no apparent reason. As a result, you may still find yourself walking around in a state of mind-numbing fatigue while trying to juggle all your responsibilities.
If that's the case, you need to take steps to minimize your fatigue, such as pacing yourself, setting priorities, and being realistic about how much you can do. But there are other things you can do to make your fatigue more bearable. While they may not make up for your lack of sleep, these measures can conserve your energy.
Essential
It's a myth that people need less sleep when they get older. In reality, older adults still need the optimal seven to nine hours of rest that younger adults do. What does happen is that sleep becomes harder to attain because of bad sleep habits that are now entrenched, greater sensitivity to noise, and illness. Older adults are also more likely to nap, which can disrupt nighttime sleep, and to suffer sleep disorders, such as restless legs syndrome.
Delegate, Delegate, Delegate
Some people have a hard time letting responsibilities go. They don't trust their spouses to clean the house the right way, their children to do chores, or their colleagues to do a good job. Now that you have fibromyalgia, you have to forget these notions and rely on the people around you for assistance. Get in the habit of handing out responsibilities to people around you and accepting that things will not necessarily be done the way you want them done.
At home, that means asking your spouse, roommate, or children to step up to the plate and do chores you normally handled. Even little kids can empty small wastebaskets, make beds, and load a dishwasher. It helps if you can make a game of it. At work, it means asking colleagues and subordinates to handle a little more on a bad day.
Some people have a hard time handing off tasks to others. You may think that you're the only one who can do the job right. If that sounds like you, practice doling out the less important tasks first, then work toward delegating more critical ones, if necessary. With practice, and as you slowly learn to let go, it will get easier.
Learn to Say No
While it might have been exciting to delve into new projects in the past, conserving your energy has now become more important. That's why you need to learn how to say no. For some people, saying no doesn't come easily. If you're one of them, try posting some stock phrases near the phone or by the computer. That way, when a request comes via telephone or e-mail, you'll be ready with a response. Good answers might be, “I'd love to help, but this is not a good time for me,” or “Gee, that sounds interesting, but I'm really not the right person for it.” Or if you choose to be more direct, you can simply say, “Thank you for asking. But I'm going to have to say no right now.”
If saying no still doesn't come easily to you, look for other strategies that might make you less uneasy. For instance, if your boss is deluging you with work, ask him to prioritize what's most important so you know where to focus your efforts. Or if a volunteer group leader asks you to do yet another task, find out if there's another obligation that you can drop. The goal is to ensure that you don't let others impose too many responsibilities on you — responsibilities that will eventually tire you out. Remember, healthy people set healthy boundaries.
Balance Rest and Activity
In a society that puts a premium on achievement, stopping to take a rest might seem entirely counterintuitive. But for someone who has fibromyalgia, rest is critical to keeping fatigue at bay.
For fibro patients, energy is like money in your bank account. If you just spend and spend, you're going to run out. Rest, on the other hand, is like making a deposit or an investment in your well-being. For someone with fibromyalgia, it's important to make as many deposits as possible.
Balancing rest and activity doesn't mean that you should be confined to bed or that you should concede defeat. What it does mean is that you should simply stop and take a regular break — before you feel overexerted. If you're having a particularly bad time, you might need to put more emphasis on rest and less on activity. During periods of remission, you might get away with doing a little more. The key is always giving your body the opportunity to rest.
Nap, If Needed
In some cultures, an afternoon nap is a cherished part of the routine. But in our hectic lives, most people regard napping as an indulgence that disrupts progress on the to-do list. For people with fibromyalgia, however, a nap may be necessary, particularly if their sleep has been especially bad.
Alert
Resist the urge to grab a cup of coffee to keep you going. Caffeine is a stimulant that can keep you awake. But after it wears off, it leaves you even more tired than before. You should also avoid other foods and drinks that contain caffeine, such as tea, soda, energy drinks, and anything that contains chocolate.
If you do choose to nap, do it in the early afternoon. Avoid sleeping too long, since that can make it harder for you to sleep later on. Experiment with the amount of time that works best for you. For some people, that might mean napping for just fifteen to twenty minutes, while others may be able to sleep as much as forty-five minutes.
