Before you became ill, you may have invested a lot of time and energy in your relationships. The energy you devoted to people you love probably came very easily to you. When you have a chronic illness like fibromyalgia, your priorities must naturally shift. Now that you have fibromyalgia, taking care of yourself has to come first. Think of the announcement you hear each time you board an airplane, when the flight attendants ask that you put the oxygen mask on yourself before tending to your children. The same philosophy applies with fibromyalgia. Only by caring for yourself first are you able to continue nurturing the relationships in your life.

For some people, this shift is difficult. You may be accustomed to thinking of others first. What will little Johnny do if he can't make it to soccer practice? How will the committee function if you're not there to take notes? How will your spouse prepare a meal if you can't make dinner? At the very least, you probably gave as much as you took and often traded off tasks with friends and loved ones, so that everyone could get things done.

But having FMS requires that you put yourself first and foremost; your health must take center stage over anything else you do. Trying to convince loved ones, friends, colleagues, and employers of this new shift can be difficult, however, especially when you don't appear to be sick. Some may never understand and will simply drift away. Others may get hostile, taking your absence as a sign that you no longer care about them. Still others may hear you out but not really grasp the severity of your condition. But the ones who truly care will stand by you and help you make these adjustments.

When you have a chronic disease, it's easy to feel lonely. Friends may have a difficult time understanding the true extent of your pain and fatigue. Your children may not comprehend the difficulties you face. Your spouse may be overwhelmed, even terrified by the prospect of spending his life with someone battling a strange medical condition.

That's why it's so important to find or create the support you need. Whether it's an existing relationship with a spouse or a close friend, or a new one with a support group, a strong network of social support is important to your health. It may buffer you from the pain of a flare-up, buoy you on days when your spirits are down, and help redirect your attention and energies elsewhere. A solid support network offers a palliative that no pharmaceutical can ever deliver.