In addition to thinking about and understanding what you expect to happen when you become a father, you should know what your partner expects of you. A lot of the conflicts and problems that arise between parents during their baby's first year result from very different expectations about each parent's role. To avoid this, it's a good idea to talk about these roles before the baby comes along.

Unfortunately, many people don't think about this in advance. Too often, each parent has his or her own expectation of what the other is going to do, and these expectations don't match. So a new father might be thinking that as long as he helps around the house a little more, he won't have to bother with diapers or feedings, when the mother is expecting help in both areas.

Sometimes, even when parents-to-be agree on the roles they each will take, their expectations and needs change once the baby comes home. When this happens, parents often can just re-evaluate their roles and try to change the way that they are doing things.

Sometimes, though, the situation is more serious and the parents may require counseling. This can happen if either or both parents realize that this isn't what they want to be doing, that they need more help, or that they simply can't handle caring for a baby. If you reach this point, it's likely that you will need some professional help if your family is going to stay together.