Moving with Your Children
Concern that your spouse may want to relocate to another state with the children may be a strong motivator in seeking a shared parenting arrangement. Suppose you and your family live in Oregon and your spouse has family in Kansas. Your spouse is having trouble finding a decent job, and you don't make enough to support two households. Your spouse may be strongly tempted to return to Kansas under such circumstances. The laws about moving, or removal, vary from state to state, but it's harder for one parent to move a significant distance with the children when the other parent has a major role in their lives.
To Move…
Again, laws vary from state to state. In some states, the parent who wants to move has to show the court the move is in the child's best interests. This means the parent who wants to move has a legitimate need to move; for example, an employer makes relocation a condition of keeping a job, the custodial parent has an extended family and support system in a distant state, or the custodial parent is having a hard time making ends meet in the state where the divorce is taking place. The parent seeking the move will need to show she has done research on housing and schools and, most important, that the moving parent has a plan for the child to maintain contact with the other parent.
If you're concerned that a move may be a possibility, you may want to seek at least joint physical custody to make it harder for your spouse to take the children to a distant location. Be sure to discuss this concern with your lawyer.
Or Not To Move?
Other states put the burden on the parent who is not moving. This parent will have to show the court why the move is not in the child's best interests. The parent who is remaining will need to show that the child is integrated into the community, that the child has a close and important relationship with the parent who is not moving, that the move will be harmful to the child's stability, or that the other parent doesn't really have to move.
