The area of alternative dispute resolution is constantly being fine-tuned, and you may want to take advantage of some growing trends. You may not be able to come to an agreement using negotiation, mediation, or arbitration, but some slightly different options offer you privacy, a quick timeline, and a relatively low cost.

Mediation-Arbitration Hybrid

It's possible to combine forms of alternative dispute resolution. The most common hybrid is using mediation and arbitration in tandem, often referred to as “med-arb.” For example, you and your spouse mediate and resolve all your issues except spousal maintenance; you then agree to submit this issue to arbitration. The beauty of this concept is that you exercise control over all the decisions that you can agree on, then let a third person resolve issues you can't resolve.

When you choose med-arb, you should have your lawyers prepare a written agreement stating that you'll mediate all issues you can, and if you're unable to mediate an issue, you'll submit that issue to arbitration. It's critical to be clear about whether this arbitration is binding or nonbinding. If it's binding, the arbitrator's decision is final. No appeal is possible and your divorce is done. This is cheaper and faster than going to court, and you'll be happier with the outcome. If it's nonbinding, you can decide you don't like the decision and go to trial.

The Special Master

In some states, you and your spouse can agree to hire a private sector expert, called a special master, or a special magistrate, to be your judge. This is similar to binding arbitration, except that your agreement will state you have the right to appeal the decision of the special master. That is, you give this person the authority to decide your case as if he were a trial court judge, and, just as if you were in a trial court, you reserve the right to appeal. A special master will charge for his time; it will be expensive, but you get your case heard by an expert in the field, and you get it heard now. Avoiding delay may save you money in the long run. It will certainly mitigate the emotional stress of having the case drag on and on and on. Your divorce will be as legal and final as if a judge had heard it.