It seems that counseling or psychotherapy is recommended for just about every modern ailment. What is therapy, what's so great about it, and what can you expect to get from it?

What Is Therapy?

Therapy is treatment for behavior, thoughts, and emotions in an interpersonal relationship with the practitioner. There are many different schools of therapy; what you are likely to find today is a combination of approaches. Most therapists will spend some time learning more about the client and the factors, both internal and external, that are causing the immediate problems in her life. The client will also get a chance to “unload” and speak freely to a neutral third party about what's bothering her. Next, the therapist will spend some time with the client working through those issues and teaching her practical solutions, such as changing thought processes. This takes time, practice, and follow-through. Finally, the therapist will evaluate the treatment for effectiveness and recommend any necessary next steps.

If your child is in therapy, she will not be lying on a leather couch staring up at the ceiling and talking about Oedipus. Therapists who work with children adapt their practices to make them age-appropriate. Small children may play with puppets, draw with crayons, or engage in other “play” that helps them articulate their feelings and describe the stressors in their life. Older children may be asked to read an age-appropriate book on their own or with the therapist, or select a figurine that speaks to them and describe to the therapist how it relates to their life. If your child needs to be in therapy, you can prepare her by saying, “You know what the doctor is, right? The doctor helps your body stay healthy. Well, a therapist is a special kind of doctor for your feelings, and you can talk about any feeling you have, like feeling sad or worried, with the therapist.”

Therapy Options and Scenarios

Most likely, a therapist will recommend that you attend therapy as well. In an ideal world, the child would be in individual therapy, the parent(s) would be in individual therapy and possibly marriage counseling, and the whole family would come in for group counseling. However, this would be logistically difficult, exhausting, and probably quite expensive.

A more realistic solution is to seek education and strategies through a parenting support group (usually available through a therapist or hospital), enroll the child in therapy once a week or once every other week with a therapist who will give you updates after each session, and enroll in family therapy on the odd weeks.