Quiz: The Dirty Dozen
Many of the things we have in common aren't obvious. They're things that you don't think of or talk about very often — or at all.
Here are twelve questions to get you started. Just jot down your responses, but make sure to give each one a lot of thought. They might seem kind of weird, but there is a point here — promise.
If a question makes you feel uncomfortable, just skip it. We want to find embarrassing moments here, not deep-rooted personal traumas! Lighten up, this is supposed to be fun.
What was the worst present you ever got? How old were you when you received it? Were you disappointed because you were expecting something else? Was it something practical when you wanted something fun? Was it obviously “regifted?” Was it insulting or embarrassing? Did it show that the person who gave it to you had no clue about your likes and dislikes?
What was the worst job you ever had? Were you bad at it? Was it embarrassing? Below your skill level? Above your skill level? Did you work with weird people? Was it doing something disgusting? How did you get the job? Were you fired? Did you quit? How did you leave?
What is a guilty pleasure of yours? What is something that you really like, but never really admit that you like? Are you really macho and love a certain heart-wrenching chick flick? Are you quiet and demure but love violent and gory action movies? Is it something you have to do on your own, in secret, because you're too embarrassed to admit it?
What is something that you are supposed to like that you just don't get? Is it a classic film that you just can't stand? A popular food that people think you're weird for not liking? A singer or band that is universally loved — just not by you? Do you usually play along and pretend you like it, or do you have an argument about it every time it comes up?
What is something that you used to be really into, but now you can't see why you ever liked it? Was it a TV show you were obsessed about as a kid, but now have absolutely no interest in whatsoever? Was it a hobby or sport you were passionate about that now seems really lame to you? At what point did your feelings about it change?
Have you ever said something and immediately wished you could take it back? What was it? Was it socially embarrassing? Did it just sound stupid? Were you using e-mail to gossip about someone, then accidentally forwarded the e-mail to that person? How did you get out of the situation?
What was the worst date you ever had? Was it a blind date? An online romance that fizzled when you met face-to-face? A crush who you finally won over, and turned out to be completely different from what you imagined? Was it not the person but the date itself that caused the problems?
Describe the worst photo of you that was ever taken? Was it just a hair day from hell? Is it a photo that went out for everyone to see, like a newspaper photo, photo ID, or yearbook photo? Was it a photo that you thought at the time made you look really cool, but is now hopelessly dated?
Do you have a pet peeve? Is there some small thing that really gets on your nerves and drives you crazy but seems so insignificant, petty, or silly that you're almost too embarrassed to even mention it? Do you know anyone that shares your pet peeve or are you pretty much alone on this one?
Did you ever unintentionally lie about something small that you are now stuck with and have to live with? Was it an attempt to gain approval from others? Do you continue to perpetuate that lie just out of habit?
Is there someone you know fairly well, someone you see all the time, whose name you don't know? Is it a friend or a coworker? Even worse, is it a relative? Have you ever been with that person and prayed that you wouldn't have to introduce him to anyone? Are you embarrassed to ask for help with this? Are you afraid it might get back to that person?
Is there anything embarrassing or stupid you've done, an event or a moment that still occasionally haunts you? Have you ever been walking along, having a great day, and suddenly this embarrassing thing enters your head and ruins your whole day?
Okay, pencils down, pass your papers to the front. Was it hard to answer these questions, or was it painfully easy? Everyone has these kinds of personal thoughts. Everyone has socially awkward moments, things they'd like to forget but can't, things they just don't talk about — unless they're comedians. By bringing these personal, unspoken topics up and making fun of them, you can make the audience feel that they are not alone.