It's okay to be merciful to your students sometimes. In fact, it's often a lot easier to show mercy to a student than to punish her. That's where you sometimes get into trouble as a teacher, by giving your kids chances over and over again. But you just can't help it; you're a teacher, so naturally you're compassionate and merciful toward kids. If you didn't love kids, you never would've become a teacher. And caring about kids the way that you do, it's hard to punish them — and easy to forgive.

And you should forgive; you should show mercy. But only where and when it is appropriate to do so. If a student yells out in class, you admonish him, and he quickly apologizes, you probably don't need to write in his agenda — forgive him. He's human, these mistakes happen. If a student accidentally trips another student then apologizes profusely and you trust his sincerity, you probably don't need to call home — forgive him. Or, if a student glances at another student's paper during a test and you admonish, “Keep your eyes on your own paper” and he instantly buries himself in his work, you probably don't need to issue a detention — forgive him.

After all, have you ever had to be forgiven for a mistake? Of course you have; you wouldn't be a human being otherwise. Therefore, if you need to be forgiven, other people need the same thing, especially kids who make so many silly mistakes because they're learning every day how to live in society and how to become thoughtful human beings. Also, you give chances so that later on your own conscience will be clear. Specifically, if a chronically misbehaving kid or her parents claim you've been unfair, you can point to the documented chances you've given the kid, over and over, such as agenda notes, calls, personal counseling, etc., before you were forced to move on to detentions, suspensions, and meetings with the principal.

The bottom line is you do what is ethically required to make sure no one interferes with your students' education, even if you must send a student out occasionally. On the other hand, if an act of mercy seems warranted in a particular situation for a particular child, then give the kid a chance.