For all the reasons that you don't want to buy a house or a convertible, you also don't want to commit to another relationship right after a separation or divorce. Post-divorce romances tend to go something like this:

1. “I can't be alone…I must find someone!” This may last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months (or, in some cases, years), but it tends to be the initial response after the reality of separation or divorce sinks in. In fact, some people are so sure they can't be alone that they find someone before a crumbling marriage ends.

If this phase sounds like where you are, seek out a support group or therapist who can help you become

2. “Marriage? Ewww. No way.” As the divorce is finalized — and especially if one spouse was financially disadvantaged in the divorce — feelings of “never, ever again” may quickly surface. This is common, but it generally doesn't last.

So, don't worry too much about these feeling, but also don't make any irreversible decisions during this time (such as having a vasectomy) that may be the result of a phase rather than a true lifelong desire.

3. “I just want to play.” Casual dating tends to come next. This is when dating people who are emotionally or intellectually incompatible tends to happen. During this phase, whatever you do, don't get married or give away money. It is extraordinarily rare for this person to actually end up being right for you.

One divorce is bad enough, but jumping into another relationship that is almost assured of going south will likely lead to a second, and that's doubly hard. Note: Phases 2 and 3 may be reversed or may even occur at the same time!

4. “I could see myself getting married again, but I would miss being single, too.” Now you're ready to date seriously. If you've developed such strong social networks and such a pleasant home life for yourself that you would miss your singleness, yet at the same time you can envision meeting and marrying the right person, you're likely ready to consider entering a long-term relationship.