Change is never easy, and finding new ways of doing things can be a challenge. However, you may find the most difficult aspect of living with arthritis is asking for help. Some people have an easier time asking for help than others. You may feel it's a strike against your independence. You may feel you are imposing on someone or being a burden. The harsh reality is that you need help and you need to adjust your thinking to find that acceptable.

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness; it's part of the human condition. Every person needs some help from time to time.

Your family and friends often don't know what to do and actually feel helpless. If they can relieve some of your pain and make things less difficult, they want to do just that. They want nothing more than to be able to help.

Only ask for help when you absolutely need it. Do what you can do first before asking for help. If asking is somehow embarrassing to you, do it discretely. The kindest thing you can do for the person from whom you need help is to give advance notice. Try not to surprise them with a to-do list. Usually, people who are given enough time to plan for it and adjust their own schedules genuinely don't mind helping.

Try to package together the chores you need help with so your helper can get more done in one visit. Be reasonable though; the more time that passes before you ask for help, the longer your list grows. Try to address things in a reasonable amount of time so that you don't overload your helper with things to do.

Most people only need a thank you to feel good about helping you. An expression of sincere appreciation is the only form of repayment necessary. If you feel compelled to do more than just offer a sincere thank you, do something special and memorable for the person. Send flowers, bake a pie, take the person to the movies, or buy their dog some dog treats. Choose a gesture that shows how much you value their time and friendship.