Talking to a Loved One About His or Her Problem
Talking to someone about his food problems can be difficult. It may be easy to see the problem, but no one wants to bring the subject out into the open. If you really care, take a deep breath and let your friend or loved one know you care enough to take the risk to talk.
First, make sure you have your facts straight about food addiction. Do some homework and read up on the subject. Making observations can be less threatening than direct confrontation. For example, “I've noticed how you sometimes eat a whole package of cookies at a time and then you just seem droopy afterward. I'm concerned.”
Alert
Eating disorders are more widespread than one might think. According to Student Services at Brown University, as many as one in three college women struggle with an eating disorder before graduating from college. Stressors such as school, career, and relationship problems are often cited as triggers that may initiate an eating disorder or exacerbate an existing one.
Genuine compliments about attributes other than appearance may help the food addict to realize she is more than the food she eats. A personal sense of value may translate into “I'm worth addressing this food problem.” Express concern and then listen without judgment or condemnation. It is more than likely that the person with a food addiction has spent considerable time already condemning herself.
When should someone with a food addiction seek professional treatment?
When life revolves around food and it's difficult to enjoy normal life activities, it's time to seek help. If the fear and anxiety of being discovered binge-eating, hoarding food, or overspending on food controls your life, it's time to get help. If managing food seems out of your control, it's time to get help.
It is never helpful to continually monitor what the food addict is eating. Offer to help, but don't give unsolicited advice. Such advice often puts the food addict in a position where she feels like a “naughty child” instead of an adult who needs to take responsibility for her problem.
Be a positive role model without communicating condemnation. Offer to exercise with a person at his level, or invite him over to cook a healthy meal together. Take the time to find out the food addict's trigger foods so those are definitely NOT on the menu. Social support can be very helpful, as food addiction is often a disorder developed in secrecy.
